Threesome Rant   4 comments

Threesome Rant – Male/Female/Male.

Warning: Crude Language!

Now, I know that this topic of rant is not true about ALL of the threesome fics out there. This rant is for all of the fics out there that are like – and trust me, there are MANY, for I have read a hell of a lot of them.

First of all, I have to let you guys know that I am a person that reads only Harry-centric fics, and I am a loyal, dedicated SLASH fan, though I enjoy reading a good het fic as well. I feel I have to mention this, otherwise those who read this and don’t like SLASH, will question why this rant is such a big deal, or why I find is a big deal. Oh, and I love threesome fics, so long as Harry is the focal point of the threesome and the middle, as I like to call it.

It is that reason (middle-Harry) that I feel I must rant about this topic…

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Okay, here we go. Threesomes…Example: Ron, Harry, Hermione threesomes.

When reading threesome fics, I like SLASH to be the focal pairing or at least more so then the HET, and definitely Harry has to be the focal point of the threesome. I like reading het, too, but slash will always come first in the threesomes that I read. I want a LOT of slash action, with het being a sub-focus.

There are a lot of Golden Trio threesomes out there, and I enjoy reading those, along with other Harry-threesomes. When I do read them, I always go into the fic praying that Ron and Harry will fuck or at the very least, suck each other off. I always want Harry to bottom (in all slash fics, not just threesomes), as I have a real obsession with submissive-Harry – he can’t do anything BUT bottom, when it comes to slash. I can’t read top-Harry, it’s just wrong to me.

My perfect Trio threesome would be Ron fucking Harry, while Harry fucks Hermione – Ron/Harry/Hermione, with Harry in the very middle, receiving the most pleasure, obviously. It’s just the hottest thing to read and to picture. Ron, all 6 foot 4 and muscular, fucking Harry (5 foot 10 at the most), while Harry is being rocked, forcefully from Ron’s thrusts, into Hermione pussy. It’s just hotter then fuck.

However, what I usually end up getting in MOST of the threesome fics is Ron and Harry focusing their attention on Hermione – a Ron/Hermione/Harry, where Ron has her front and Harry her back, most likely. This does not turn me on in the LEAST.  Again, I’m a Slash-addict, and this just doesn’t do anything for me. Plus, I really hate Hermione, most of the time in fanfiction, so to have her be the focal point of both boys, when there is hardly any slash action between Ron and Harry, just really pisses me off.

It’s not just Hermione, though – even if R/Hr/H does make me the most angry, because of the fact that I hate her, and Ron/Hermione – it’s all threesomes, where the chick ends up being the focal point of the two males, one of which obviously is always Harry.

Seriously, though, I can’t be the only person that HATES IT when you get into a fic, looking and hoping for some BoyxBoyxGirl action and then realize that instead, you’re getting BoyxGirlxBoy! I can’t be the only slash-addict out there, or the only Hermione-hater or Ron/Hermione hater for that matter.

It is kind of ironic, really. I love reading Ron/Harry/Hermione threesomes, and while I love Harry above all other characters and it’s understandable here, I hate Ron AND Hermione, and especially Ron/Hermione. I simply loath the R/Hr pairing, it’s the only pairing that I will stop reading a fic over. Seriously, I will. I’ll be reading a really amazing story (Harry-centric of course), and the first sign of R/Hr, and especially before Harry is even in a relationship or even has his eyes on someone, romantically, I’ll exit the fic very fast, and be very angry about it. That pairing, R/Hr, ruins a good fic faster than anything else EVER could. REMEMBER THAT, PEOPLE!

The only time I’ll read the trio threesomes is if Harry is the focal and middle of the three. It’s the only way I can get through them. If it is a focal-Harry, bottom-Harry and middle-Harry fic, between Ron/Harry/Hermione, I’ll cry because I’d be very, very happy. However, they are very rare, I noticed, and therefore I do not read very many threesome fics.

If you know any good ones, please recommend them to me! Can be on any website – Fanfiction.Net, Adultfanfiction.net, Restricted Section.org, etc. Whatever, I’ll be very thankful and I’ll definitely read them. They do not have to be Ron/Harry/Hermione – they can be any threesome, so long as they are Harry-centric, and of course, he has to be the main bottom of the threesome, the middle and the focus of the threesome. It doesn’t also have to involve a female, is can be Harry and three other males as well. NO Harry and two females, though, please!

 THANK YOU!!!

4 responses to “Threesome Rant

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  1. Hello there. I actually hate those kind of fics and must prefer it if Hermione is the submissive/vulnerable/abused one and Harry and Ron are taking care of her but whatever. A fic which I personally don’t like but will hopefully appeal to you is Reunion by calliope14 AKA ceilidh. Even though you hate them, can you tell me some fics that will appeal to me since you have seen so many and I haven’t?

  2. Sorry, I can’t help you. I don’t keep track of the stories I don’t like. However, if you are of appropriate age, I would recommend looking at the website, http://www.restrictedsection.org/ because they do have a few there. Also, I think http://hp.adultfanfiction.net/index.php has a few as well. Or you can try googling the ship, or going to http://www.fictionalley.org and to the Help, I’m Looking For… forum and post a thread. I wish I could help you more and actually give you some fics. Sorry about that!

  3. No problem. Thanks for your help anyway!!!

  4. Omg YES FINNALLY SOMEONE IS A SLASH ADDICT LIKE ME!!!!!!!!! And you hate Ron an Hermione. Are you an Angel?

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